The 'Me' I Forgot Existed

We.Feel.Weather

For a long time, if you asked me what I do for me, the answer was always "nothing." My life is a constant loop of being "Mum," doing courses, cooking, cleaning, and the school run. I’m always busy, always educating myself, but I’d completely forgotten how to just be me at the end of it all.

It took a trip to the doctor’s office to really see it. I was at my lowest point, and during that appointment, the question came up: What do you do for yourself? I sat there, and I had nothing. It was a wake-up call. I realised in that moment that I desperately needed an actual answer.

For Christmas, my partner in Scotland bought me an easel and some watercolours. I’ll be honest—I’d tried them once, felt completely overbearing at the time, and shoved them to the back of the room. They stayed there for ages, just gathering dust and catching the occasional guilty glance from me while I got on with the "important" stuff of the day-to-day.

But after that appointment, I finally put the laptop down.

Letting go of the "Instagram" Pressure

I sat down with the paints, but I almost stopped before I started. I kept looking at Instagram for inspiration, but everyone there is a professional. Their work is perfect, and mine... well, isn't. It felt intimidating until I realised that intricate detail isn't my style anyway. I love abstract—just splodges of paint and simple shapes.

So, I decided to just let go. I stopped trying to organise my next paint stroke and just did it. It felt so good to drop those expectations I put on myself. Some of it looked great! Some of it? Not so much. I am definitely a beginner, but that wasn't the point.

The Silence of it All

For my mental health, this was everything. It made me realise that I am my own person as well as a parent. It gave me a sense of freedom in the silence—a silence where I didn't have to think about what’s for dinner, how to entertain my child, or when the laundry needs doing. For once, I wasn't entertaining anyone but myself.

I won’t lie and say it was easy energy-wise. I actually found it quite tiring to set everything up, and because I don’t have a dedicated space for it yet, it took a lot out of me. I’ll probably take a few days to recover from the activity, but the feeling of self-appreciation was worth it.

Fancy a go?

If you’re like me and don’t know where to start, this is the exact set my partner got me [Link to Amazon Set]. It isn’t intimidating at all and has everything you need for those little "pockets of peace." The easel is great because it can sit on a small coffee table or even your lap, like I did (though a comfy chair is definitely preferred!).

If you're feeling a bit dimmed lately, try a tiny challenge for yourself. Paint or colour three simple shapes. Nothing complicated, nothing perfect. Just see how it feels to do something that is purely for you.

Quietly Sharing,

Tina